The Gift of a 69th Year: February 2015

Thursday, February 26, 2015

I'm Home Again

I have felt overwhelmed with gratitude for all I was able to do in six days of travel. Jim and I both spent time with Jeff's family and Laura's family. I had a wonderful evening with Dan and Raven. They shared some good things of their life with me--a favorite Japanese restaurant and the view of Manhattan from the Brooklyn side of the East River. Dan invited me to see his office and I traveled downtown for that as well.

In New York itself, I met with two friends that I know from our church in South Bend. Maggie is there for a full month and it was great to see her with her daughter-in-law and the new baby--and to get her out for a few hours of walking and talking and eating. I was able to see Linda who is there supporting her Morgan, her 23 year old son, and his wife during Morgan's year long treatment for soft tissue sarcoma. I got teary listening to her but she is very brave and strong and so is Morgan.

And then the experiences of New York itself--gasping at the Martha Graham dancers , smiling for 80 minutes at "Texas in Paris" at the York Theatre, seeing Pollock and Manet and Van Gogh works on walls instead of in books at the MOMA, meditating on Psalm 104 through Barbara Wolff's illuminated manuscripts at the Morgan--and more. Looking out at the Empire State Building from my 16th floor window and looking at dirty subway platforms--those are the contrasts of NYC. Listening to garbage trucks, horns honking, sirens blaring--even in the middle of the night--those are the sounds of NYC.

A few of the moments I will treasure were when I stopped to chat with someone--a danger of becoming a garrulous old lady--but fun. I asked a MOMA guard, when I noticed him noticing a baby, if he enjoyed seeing guests smile at the art. He said that he doesn't look at the faces all that much but once he had a woman fall down at the floor in tears when she saw Van Gogh's "Starry Night." She said she had waited all her life for that sight. He said he was moved to tears himself.

And then the woman on the train who looked at me a bit askance when the place emptied next to me in a two person seat. I said that I thought there was room. She sat down and told me she used to weigh 240 pounds but now weighed 202. I hoped she wasn't insulted by my comment and said I was looking at the room I was taking up. She told me, "Don't eat ice cream." But then when she asked me if I heard voices, I thought maybe we better end our conversation!

I told the check-out fellow at Trader Joe's in Brooklyn (one of 30!) that we needed a Trader Joe's in South Bend. He said he'd put in a good word if I'd put in a good word for them with only one Trader Joe's for 2.9 million people in Brooklyn!

How grateful I am to have had the energy and the time and the money to make such a trip. Planning it, doing it, and now blogging about it--and treasuring the memories--all very good!

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Travels in February Part II

Today was a bright, sunny day and it was good to be out on the streets in New York City. I had a pleasant walk up 5th Avenue to the MOMA and an exciting almost two hours there. That was enough. All of a sudden I couldn't look at one more work of art no matter how amazing it was.

It seemed legal to take photos so I did--of works that I thought were beautiful or interesting or in one case, very dubious. Seeing a Pollock or a Manet in a textbook--small and flat--makes one wonder about their appeal. Seeing these paintings filling a whole wall gives a much different perspective--and appreciation.

A big red painting caught my eye. Why do a large canvas all in red?

Vir Heroicus Sublimis ,
Newman’s largest painting at the time of its completion, is meant to overwhelm the senses. Viewers may be inclined to step back from it to see it all at once, but Newman instructed precisely the opposite. When the painting was first exhibited, in 1951 at the Betty Parsons Gallery in New York, Newman tacked to the wall a notice that read, “There is a tendency to look at large pictures from a distance. The large pictures in this exhibition are intended to be seen from a short distance.” Newman believed deeply in the spiritual potential of abstract art. The Latin title of this painting means “Man, heroic and sublime.”

I did as Newman requested and it was like entering "redness" itself. Pretty cool.

Then there was The Air Rifle Shot one--no hole in the wall--just the words. That was art as language. Or maybe just a bit silly.

Dan and I had been texting and he wondered if I'd like to see his office. Sure was my reply. I walked to the York Theatre to get my ticket for tonight's performance--getting a little lost in the church and finding myself in a lobby with homeless folk waiting for their lunch--and then took the E train to Union Square where I met Dan in the lobby at 200 Park Avenue. The Hammer Lab was a lot different (one room with ten stations or so) than Google's one full block of offices but very nice and a good space--and a good job--for Dan.

After a little lunch at Pret Manger, I took the 5 train to 42nd Street, got some coffee, and am now relaxing in my room for a few hours.
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10 pm--back at 70 Park Avenue. I skipped the complimentary wine reception, a nice feature of Kimpton hotels, and went to church instead. Really. I walked to St. Thomas Church at 5th Avenue and 52nd Street and worshipped at the Festival Eucharist for St. Matthias. I thought it was going to be Evensong and might have preferred that. The gentlemen of the choir sang and were a bit disappointing to me. The soprano men's voices seemed harsh.

I walked the short three blocks to the York Theatre at Saint Peter's Church where I smiled for 80 minutes while Lillias White and Scot Wakefield performed a two person show Texas in Paris. The music was wonderful--cowboy songs and gospel songs--and the message of racial reconciliation was heart-warming.

Another Pret Manger half-sandwich and a glass of $14 cabernet from the bar--complimentary with a $15 voucher however--and I settled back into my room to listen to the Irish men lose to Syracuse.

It has been a wonderful day--and a wonderful stay both with family and in NYC. Now I hope that tomorrow night at this time I am with Jim and home.

Monday, February 23, 2015

Travels in February

Again, this blog post is to have a way to record memories of travel. The title is significant. Travels in February present their own problems in the northern climate we enjoy.

We slept restlessly and got up with our alarms at 4 am. That is the price one pays to take advantage of the United non-stop flight from South Bend to Newark--thus avoiding the often problematic delays or cancellations in Detroit or Chicago. We walked across the snowy parking lot in minus 10 degrees temperature with a wind chill of minus 22! The seat and the seat belt buckle in the plane were painfully cold and there was no heat until just before take-off. But the flight went well.

We took the Air Train and connected with the New Jersey Transit Train to Princeton Junction. A short taxi ride took us to the Hertz rental agency in a nearby Hyatt where the agent told us our taxi fare ($12 for 1 1/4 miles!) would be refunded! We thought that was pretty fair! It was an easy ride to Gladwyne where Jim met Alex for the first time and where we enjoyed the company of three busy grandchildren and their parents.

Michael and Laura fixed a steak dinner and a cake for Jim's birthday. Ruth made him a card and so did Jasper in which he had placed a $5 bill in a pocket. Laura told him that he probably didn't need to do that so the pocket was empty when he gave the card to Jim.

Saturday morning Ruth joined us at 6:45 and Laura brought in Alex at 7:15 hoping to get an extra hour of sleep. So it was four of us in our bed until Ruth and I went downstairs to make pink pancakes.  Ruth learned that if you lick the edges of the bowl with your tongue, it gets pink batter in your hair.

Alex is wonderful and totally mysterious. He smiled and cooed and then suddenly would cry hard. He could be pacified with his pacifier usually--but not always. Ruth's language ability is amazing. She uses words like "definitely" and "apparently." She told Jim that Grandpa was his first name and then she thought a bit and said that Jim was his next name.

We left for Princeton around 12:30 when the snow was just starting. The roads got worse as we traveled on and the visibility was bad. We were very glad when the dance performance at the New Jersey Devils game was cancelled and we didn't need to drive to Newark. After dinner, Jeff drove us back to the hotel. That short trip was treacherous with roads not plowed or sanded much at all.
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We treated ourselves to a little 9 pm at Ruby Tuesday's--a short walk across a slippery parking lot. We had drinks and shrimp fondue with tortilla chips. Delicious.

We were just settled into bed when the alarms went off with a terrible noise and flashing lights. I grabbed my shoes and coat and purse and then waited for Jim to dress. When he took the time to double knot his shoe laces, I lost it and started yelling to get going. We walked down the four flights of stairs and joined everyone else in various states of dress and undress in the hotel lobby. No information was offered which made it even more frustrating.

Several fire engines with their crews joined us and eventually the fire chief told us that a sprinkler pipe had burst and that until they could get that fixed, it was not safe to be in our rooms.  After 1 1/2 hours in the lobby, we were told that the 4th floor rooms where we stayed would not be able to be occupied at all. I quickly asked if we could get our things and go to relatives. A fireman escorted us and we packed up. When we were checking out, it became clear that we could go to the Courtyard next door--so we walked on very icy pavement to that hotel. I checked in wearing pjs--a first! It was hard to sleep after all that adrenaline was flowing--and also the parking lot was being cleaned noisily.

We drove to Jeff's on Sunday morning, I said good-bye to Jim, and then Jeff brought Katie, Susan and me to the train station. I enjoyed Katie's photos on her iphone en route. Once there I checked into the Holiday Inn Express near Madison Square Garden early. We walked down 8th Avenue, stopping for lunch at a typical NY deli and then waited at the Joyce Theatre for the show to begin.

The Martha Graham Dance performance was marvelous--colorful, dramatic, and exciting.   Some numbers were historic in nature--choreographed and costumed by Graham herself. Others were newer in origin. Our seats were great and the theatre was full of a very appreciative audience. Katie and Susan said they preferred ballet; but I enjoyed this performance much more.

Susan and Katie went on to the train station and I rested in my hotel room.

At 5:45 I walked to the 23rd Street station and boarded the A train. Sadly, the L train which was to connect at 14th Street was under repair so we were directed to board a very crowded M14 shuttle bus.. I got off at Union Square where I was able to board the L train. When I arrived at Bedford Station in Brooklyn, I emerged from underground and texted Dan. He told me to walk south to meet him and Raven. I asked with some frustration how in the world I was supposed to know what direction was south! A young, attractive passer-by heard my despair and pointed me in the right direction! I was amazed that the trains and bus were so crowded on a Sunday evening but Dan said, "There are things to do and people to see," and I guess that was true for me. However, once again, I may have been the only white-haired person on the trains.

We had a fantastic Japanese dinner at Samerai Mama. That included eel tacos, salmon rolls, a salad, beer, and a noodle dish--Udon. After dinner, we walked to the East River and enjoyed the lights of Manhattan along with a view of four bridges. It was an easy subway ride back taking the L train to the N train but there were three long and very deserted blocks to walk along 29th Street to my hotel.

My 15th floor room was right next to the elevator which concerned me, but with ear plugs, I never heard it during the night.

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Monday--Breakfast in the hotel and then the C train to High Street Station in Brooklyn where a very short walk brought me to 225 Adams where Maggie's son and his family live. It was great to meet Maggie's newest grand-daughter. We did our usual walking and talking--but in a totally new environment. We had a great lunch at Le Pain Quotidien and did some grocery shopping at the biggest and most unusual Trader Joe's I have ever seen.

It was an easy ride to go back to pick up my luggage at the Holiday Inn Express and then a mile walk to the 70 Park Avenue Hotel where I was assigned a room with a real view--1603--looking right out at the Empire State Building. I took advantage of the wine reception to get a Cabernet Sauvignon--but brought it back to the room to enjoy with my Trader Joe salad.

A Notre Dame win over Louisville --and the ability to get it on ESPN2 in my room--gave me something to do when I had no energy or motivation to go out any more today! I did have close to 16,000 steps on my iphone's health meter!

However it has been a great day and a half in the big city--and I have another day and a half to go.

Monday, February 16, 2015

Nothing to Do?

Yesterday I told my sister during our phone conversation that the only thing I had to do all week was to get my hair cut on Wednesday. What was I thinking? She has a very, very busy week ahead of her and maybe it was just the comparison. I will not be taking care of three grandchildren overnight for the week--or four other grandchildren one day while both their parents are working as she will be doing.

Instead, it looks like just the kind of busyness that is right for me in my retirement.

I said good-bye to Jim this morning and went back to my warm bed--for another whole hour! I shopped briefly and unsuccessfully for replacements for lost or broken items and, more successfully, found four potentially good reads at our local library. I met a young friend for lunch at Notre Dame and got a glimpse into a life much different than mine--one with decisions and opportunities for work and relationships.

I prepared for the Bible Study tomorrow on "Simplicity" and thought about how I need to get rid of all the stuff we hang onto--and that maybe someone else could use.

So what is ahead for the rest of the week?

The Women's Bible Study and Prayer time at church on Tuesday.

The Notre Dame Repertory Choir class on Tuesday and Thursday.

An Ash Wednesday service which means choosing and preparing organ music, making a soup to share for the meal and participating in the service.

Two Notre Dame basketball games to watch on TV--the women tonight and the men Thursday night.

The usual stuff around the house--meal preparation and laundry--particularly keeping in mind that we are leaving very, very early Friday morning for the east coast.

Busy enough but not too busy--things to do and things to learn--with plenty of time to relax and be open to possibilities.

Wednesday, February 4, 2015

The Artifacts of a Lifetime

After Mom's funeral service and lunch at church, we went to Terri's home to look over what was left of Mom's belongings. Her good china, a collection of "limited edition" plates, various other dishes, her dolls, some Hummel figurines, many photos and scrapbooks, and journals were scattered on a table and the floor. Terri was eager to clear things out.

I'm at a stage in my life where I am trying to purge our own belongings. I took a few photos of our own family and of Jim as a child and a few plates along with their "certification" that I could pass on to our children as Mom had requested.

Jeff photographed the display and sent it to Susan who thought she would like the blue Delft cups and candles. Both Dan and Jeff took a few of the old photos. Dan was intrigued with some of Mom after she had infantile paralysis as a child--relating it to the work Google had done in polio eradication.

There was a scrapbook made by Mom's mother in the 1930s full of inspirational sayings and clippings cut out of various papers. Would anyone would find that valuable as a historical record?

Terri wondered if it was an invasion of privacy to read Mom's journals. Mom had said to burn her letters from Dad. Maybe I will offer to go over the journals and record parts that would be of value to her children. As it is, we have over 30 of Dad's journals downstairs that could be donated to the center at Calvin for church history. We've looked them over briefly and found them very factual without much emotion expressed at all.

I look at our belongings. Every painting or photograph on our walls has meaning to me. Nothing is merely decorative. Almost every one is a piece of original art or a photograph of a place I loved. But would our children find value in any of it? I brought Dan around to see each piece--and then burned his French toast while doing so!

Who is going to want my wedding dress let alone other sentimentally favorite garments hanging in the upstairs closets? Who will want our books and records and travel memorabilia? Our dozens of photo albums?

My journals have so many good memories in them--but also so much angst because I often wrote for therapy. I have begun to purge them but it is not an easy exercise to do so. All the letters from pre-email days--who is going to care about those?

I guess I better just enjoy our things now because they too may be of little value to anyone else someday.